The key to comfortable conversation is to relax. relax consciously by breathing slowly and concentrate on keeping eye contact with whoever is speaking at the moment.This serves to show your interest and your willingness to participate in the conversation, which pleases the other person who then feels involved with you, as they are now aware that they have got your attention.
When you feel comfortable aim to join in a group conversation, but don’t push yourself to the center of attention straight away as this will only serve to possibly offend whoever may be speaking at the moment.
Do this by making a warm and possibly sympathetic comment on the subject being discussed, but don’t disagree with the speaker, you don’t want to appear confrontational. Or ask a general question so people will feel you as a part of the group, this will also help you to relax more.
Be willing to admit that you are not too familiar with the particular subject being discussed and ask for more information. This involves you more with the group and also gets the speaker to turn his attention towards you.
Make your first contribution to the conversation a positive statement. Offer a warm compliment, such as, ‘I think you handled that very well’ By offering a positive contribution you will notice that the atmosphere becomes more relaxed and that people begin to open up towards you.
Make your own contribution, possibly how something similar happened to you. keep it brief at this stage and non controversial. This will help to keep the conversation going and will slowly bring you into the middle of the discussion.
A clearly expressed and relevant idea will always be welcome. Maintain full eye contact as you speak. Don’t make any attempt to take the idea any further at this stage, allow the others to do that for you. You will notice that most statements are followed by leading questions as a response. Enjoy the feeling as you begin. to dominate the conversation.
As the conversation progresses you should attempt to introduce a new angle on the same subject, or a related one if the conversation appears to be waining. Perhaps you could ask someone their opinion of a related issue in todays press. You may even have planned the topic in advance and the conversation will continue on this new topic without you needing to be involved which allow you to relax and enjoy the rest of the conversation.
Take every opportunity to be with people, become involved, just by dropping the odd hint you can swing a conversation your way, allowing you to judge the way others feel on something that may be dear to you.
You don’t have to speak continuously to be considered a good conversationalist. Most people will consider you a good speaker even if you spend most of the time simply listening. They will never realize that you have manipulated the conversation for your own ends and will seek you out whenever possible in future similar situations.
Mike Collins, Owner and CEO Rotata
Free advertising without the spam
Visit my site http://www.rotata.com
Contact email mdc1258@yahoo.com
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